Toddler Lesson Learned

I want to be proactive and POSITIVE about my girls' behavior. They have definitely begun testing what they can and can't get away with. Thank goodness for my subscriptions to Parents and Parenting magazines. It is definitely worth the dollar or so a month it costs to get these gems. There was one article recently that I read that addressed changing a certain behavior/action of a toddler using positive reinforcements. So of course I had to give it a try! Here's my quick summary of the steps needed to make it happen.
1.Identify ONE specific behavior/action that needed to be changed.

2.Come up with a positive and short phrase to say when addressing the change.

3.Start by modeling the correct behavior, say the short and positive phrase, and praise yourself for doing that good action (clapping, saying yay!, etc.)

4.Repeat #3 over and over and over again throughout the day, every day.

5.Here's the hard part. Don't give negative attention for when they don't do it themselves. Instead the parent just keeps modeling the good behavior while saying that same short and positive phrase and praising.

6.According to the article the toddler should catch on to the "good" behavior/action quickly and crave that praise. Toddlers tend to be extremely impulsive too so it does warn that it's not a good idea to think your kid will never do the "bad" behavior again. The short phrase though will get them back on track quickly when they do slip up. When you use too many words, it gets too confusing since they are still learning what words mean and it literally just sounds like the Charlie Brown teacher (woh-woh-woh...). In other words, keep it short and to the point.

There has been one repeated "offense" made by my girls over and over and over again day after day that has been driving. me. CRAZY! While in their high chairs they seem to love to throw their sippy/straw cups as hard as they can to the floor. Of course milk leaks everywhere and I end up cleaning up milk off of the floor all day long. It leaves a weird film on our hardwood floor and it kinda smells foul too. Plus, the sound is loud and obnoxious and it just gets annoying having to clean milk up for TWO babies constantly.

"Mission: Set It Down" began!
1. I identified the problem-throwing cups down

2. The short and positive phrase-"Set it down"

3. I modeled setting down their cups for them. I made sure to be calm, happy, and positive every time. While I set down the cup I ALWAYS said 'Set it down' in a very calm and happy voice. I said nothing else other than that. I praised myself for setting it down by clapping and cheering. My girls seemed to like the clapping the most so that's what we stuck to.

4. I repeated #3 over and over again, every time, every day even when one of the girls would throw the cup directly at me immediately after I modeled setting it down.

5.I made sure to not give ANY attention to the throwing the cup behavior. I would simply pick up the cup, say set it down in a calm voice as I set the cup down. Sometimes I had to set the cup down on a table instead of on their high chair because they kept throwing the cup down. Even then I just ignored the "misbehavior."

6. After about 2 weeks, my girls don't throw their cups down nearly as much anymore! I noticed an improvement after just a few days. Now when they set their cups down they clap for themselves. Sometimes they just set it down as a habit, not even needing praise, but they do still seem to need the praise which is fine with me! I am happy to clap and cheer instead of saying no and getting irritated with them. Occasionally one of the girls will chuck her cup impulsively, but that is developmentally normal for a 15 month old.

Mission: Set it Down was a success!